When it starts to make sense.

“And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.” Romans 8:28

The past three years have been desert times for our family as God has shaped us and grown our faith in ways we never could have imagined.

It started with the first of two miscarriages in June 2008, then our son’s seizures started, followed by Dave making a career change that did not go as we hoped, or were promised, it would; and one month before the economy crashed. I had another miscarriage, and 2009 began with us in the worst financial position of our lives… to that point.

We say that our daughter, born in the fall of 2009, was the only good thing that came out of that year.

Dave tried several different work options but none of them panned out and the new career was still not taking shape. Voyager was not taking off the way we once hoped either and we were in a position where there was $0 available to advertise or try to fix things after a hacker destroyed his website. Our situation only got worse when I went on maternity leave that fall. Thank heavens for a few months with employer top-ups.

2010, top-up was over, Dave was working but now in a job that paid poorly, took all his time and energy, and started to make him sick.  Ever met anyone literally allergic to their work environment? He lasted until the end of Feb 2011, sick with sinus infections that eventually became full body infections every 4-6 weeks. He was out of sick days by the beginning of February.

The Write Support was growing but in the spring of 2010 I sank into a serious late-onset post-partum depression that hindered my ability to maintain focus for more than about 15 minutes – not good for an editor. A devastating loss of a close relationship tipped me over the brink and it was months before I felt like myself again. I was editing for some wonderfully supportive and understanding clients but they too were struggling to make ends meet so payment was sporatic and the stress levels in our home continued to grow.

When our son started preschool and was diagnosed with mild to moderate sensory problems we saw our first glimmer of hope. The behaviors we couldn’t understand and didn’t know how to deal with were not the signs of bad parenting – there was a reason. He qualified for help! The improvements were dramatic with the help of our Occupational Therapist and the first glimmer of calm entered our home.

In November 2010 I entered a world I had never considered returning to – the “corporate jungle”. I worked as an assistant in an insurance company for two years before I went back for my Education degree.  I wasn’t planning on going back.

If someone had asked me in 2008 what I saw for my career I could have told them right up until my retirement.  I was going to teach Junior High and then High School, get a Master’s in Education Administration, and become a principal. I was going to create resources aimed at teens and be their voice to a school system that seemed content to forget about them with resources and professional development. And I was going to train future Junior High Language Arts teachers as well.

Dave too could have told you.  He was going to find a way to get his Master’s and PhD in Archaeology as he’d always dreamed.  He was creating a new standard of photography, based of police forensic techniques, to be used in the field by Archaeologists, and someday he would get to teach it at Universities and run digs around the world.

Isn’t it great that God knows what we need more than we do?

In October 2010 I applied for a job as a writer and editor but was asked if, because of my education background, I was interested in Instructional Design. I had never even heard of the field before. Teachers and Trainers creating curriculum and delivering training in a corporate setting – that’s instructional design.  There is a whole industry out there for educators that doesn’t involve meetings, parents, report cards, and the classroom. They don’t tell you that when you enter a BEd program… at least they didn’t when I went through.

Instructional Design was fascinating and challenging and I loved it!  I was shocked at how well I fit back into the corporate world. I wanted to stay. Dave was able to leave the job that was making him sick and take over as the primary parent at home.  Our kids had me for 1.5 years and now it was Dave’s turn (Every family should do this if they can. It’s amazing how much better we understand each other now.)

Then came 8 weeks without a contract.

God was faithful and true and through some of the most surprising ways He met our needs and provided for us. (This is another story all to itself.)

During that 8 weeks Dave and I came to a place where we were truly praying for God’s will to be done.  I have prayed those words many times before and I meant them, to some extent, but I had my plans and my dreams.  The last time I let go and truly meant those words to my core I ended up pursuing education instead of law. I thought I’d learned my lesson then that God’s ways are not our ways but they sure are better. I suppose Dave and I both had more to learn.

The prayers were deep and fervent – we would do anything, go anywhere so long as God would show us clearly where He wanted us.  I no longer needed to see the map, the GPS, the plan, the inventory list, and the directions; now I just desperately wanted to know which direction to take the next step.

During this time Dave and I took some casual labor jobs to bring in what money we could.  Just as he was going to be able to do some constant work he was struck with what appears to be a family condition in the lower back.  Weeks of barely being able to move or walk, forget about heavy lifting and bending in a labor job. Dave was on his back but his mind was now open.

While God ministered to his body through the amazingly gifted people in our lives, He was prompting Dave in new directions.

God brought him to a place where he was willing to look into fields he’d never before considered. He applied to SAIT for their two year GIS Bachelor’s program. This could get him into Historical Resources and the field he loves… but this was certainly not how he planned it.

Then came my first and only job offer, so I took it. While I was qualified to do the work, it was not where my passion lay. No training, no teaching, technical writing only. But God still had a bigger picture and I could only see a single brush stroke.

What I was doing was not typical of a technical writer.  And it opened the door to a new and very exciting career with a full time position I accepted yesterday.

And Dave has been admitted to SAIT for January.

Last night Dave and I discussed the past three years and it all seemed to make more sense now.

The summary: God had to get us out of the way of His plan for our lives and our family. We had to reach a place where we meant it, to the core of our beings, when we said we’d go anywhere and do anything so long as He was leading us.

In His great mercy, God is keeping us near our families and in our home… for now.

With joy and clarity comes the next challenge, but this time it doesn’t seem so overwhelming.  We know He’ll provide for these needs too and that He has a plan so much bigger and better than our’s.

“Be still, and know that I am God…” Psalm 46:10 I’m still working on the “be still” part.

Faith is a Journey faith, God, growth, learning